The One That Got Away……Really

When we made our first trip to Canada we always wanted an early start. Every morning we woke up before 6:00AM. Most of the time the winds would be calm which gave a mirror-like surface to the water. That was our go signal. If the winds were up, we just took a little more time before hitting the water. If we were out by 6:00AM we would fish for about three hours and then head in for breakfast.

 Early morning trolling. Almost perfect water.

My mother, who liked to fish, was not an early riser. Usually in the middle of the afternoon we would take her out for a couple of hours, anchor at a cove, and just relax. The area we fished at that time of the day was very quiet. We’d catch a few fish dropping a worm over the side and she would be happy. Then one day, lightning struck, and we were not ready.

Anchored at a cove, my mother hooked into a big fish. She was using the old rod my grandfather made. That fish, whatever it was, put a big bend in it. My father looked at me with his eyes wide open. We sat in the boat giving her all kinds of instruction as she reeled the fish in. My father just kept saying “don’t horse it in”. Unfortunately we didn’t realize that the net we had, with a collapsible handle, wasn’t ready. When the fish came to the surface it was a big largemouth bass. I truly believe a bowling ball would have fit comfortably in its mouth. Seeing the fish, my mother began to panic, as she didn’t want to lose it. My father reached for the net but because the handle wasn’t engaged it started to spin and he couldn’t put it under the fish. My mother, forgetting all the instructions just given her, saw that and tried to lift the fish in the boat. Her fate was sealed at that point. The fish broke the line, and all three of us sat in stunned silence that felt like hours. What happened next is something I will never forget.

The quiet of that afternoon was broken as my mother yelled “YOU IDIOTS!”, in a decibel level that no human before or since has ever come close to matching. I’m sure people in Quebec, 300 miles away, heard those words. Dogs hid in fear. Birds flew to the safety of their nests. No words could be spoken to calm her down. If she knew how to swim I believe she would have jumped out of the boat and swam to shore.

Not funny at the time, but 55 years later, hilarious.

Go out and fool a fish!